I hear you. You are "seen".
The weight of the collective is starting to bear down on me too. I was on social media for 5 minutes and got a panic attack, so I had to go lay down with my pets for about 20 minutes, do my Valsalva Maneuver, and calm the f* down enough to get on with my day. One of the things that calmed me was sending a little energy your way. And I haven't been back on to social media since - took the day off.
Everything is spiraling so quickly - it's not even like going down the drain anymore, more like we got flushed down the toilet.
News of the new swine flu in China didn't help. Neither did hearing my husband say he's not too sure he'll be able to hang onto his [military-industrial-complex related] job.
Here's a story you may or may not relate to, if it's not for you, I'm not offended, but maybe there's something in it for you:
About 20 years ago, an old family friend - a college buddy of my mother, was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor. He was nearing retirement age, so he stopped working in advertising so he could enjoy what time he had left. They told him he'd be dead in 6-12 months. He made the conscious decision to completely ignore his brain tumor. Every weekday, he would get up, go out, get on the subway and head to Literacy Vounteers, where he would volunteer to teach reading to illiterate adults. On weekends he'd socialize, go to cultural events as he had always done, went on a couple of short vacations with his wife. I remember him telling us that he'd have good days and bad days, that some days he'd be seeing double but would still go volunteer. It gave him purpose. He did this for 5 years. He did die of the cancer, but the point was that he acknowledged the tumor's presence, and then when about his life as if he didn't care about the tumor. He gave it no energy, and even though it did kill him eventually, doctors were astounded. His quality of life was good til right near the end, and he passed quickly and peacefully.
So maybe you should put any tumors and their sizes out of your mind for now and proceed. I'm not saying deny, I'm saying acknowledge and move on.
Much love to you.
Coyote,
This is a unique period of time we are all living in. You are not alone in your uncertainty. We are living in uncertain times. Even if you were told you had a new job today, it might change by the end oof summer because everything is changing. My daughter will be teaching again next month and has no idea what that will mean. In person classes, hybrid classes, online classes? It is all uncertain.
Trust that you will get to where you need be when you need to be there.
Yes, it is only natural that you are feeling the stress of the collective. I feel it strongly right now too.
@Coyote, all has been said much better than I can do, but you are seen by many on this site who love to read your thoughts. I think the stress level will always be higher to a 'sensitive', but your health situation doesn't help (as if you don't know, sorry for stating the obvious ? ).
I am not certain if this will be of any help, but five years ago I was close to the end because of everything that I lost then. Acupuncture helped to keep some of my energy up. Perhaps it might benefit you as well?
Mind you, I didn't believe in it, but was desperate to try anything (plus I am phobic when it comes to needles). It did grant me an extra shoulder to lean on... Hope you will find some relief in a way. Change is painful, but if health is added, then it can become unbearable. Please hang in there.
I hear you. You have so much to deal with already and the stress of the collective, all the uncertainty right now is so very heavy.
As Jeanne said, sending you light and feeling gratitude for all that you have given to us.
(@laura-f - yes, a toilet flush sounds about right!! So many things, everyday, pushing at us all and not resolving yet.)
I know some qigong, and might learn more from @pikake. So that's an extra shoulder I can lean on. Although right now I really have to push myself to get it done. By the way, I feel like I should refer to you as "Canine Cousin" because of your avatar.
Yes, a toilet flush. This is the very middle of the pivot year of 2020, so it makes sense that we're all experiencing heaviness. These prophetic words from Charlotte du Cann keep going through my head:
"The problem, we knew, wasn’t going to have a neat solution, like a mindfulness class you could do every Tuesday. 'I am another yourself' was not a mantra: it meant going through all the files your cultural history threw at you, being treated like an exile, losing most of your dignity and your spending power, and then having to start over again."
The cultural files are being thrown at us thick and fast, and not just in the US.
@coyote I am going through the various qiqong walk videos to find the one with the clearest explanation of the steps and the breathing. Really wish to make it super simple & don't wish to overload you and I get what you’re saying about needing to find extra energy just to do an exercise routine, qiqong or otherwise. I’ll get you the video tomorrow and we’ll move forward one qiqong step at a time.
Thanks Febbby23. I worked to Let Go and Let God and three people arrived that helped to clarify and solve three major issues/stressors. For a while there I was overwhelmed and struggling a bit.
I am not feeling all that well physically. Getting bloodwork soon...my dad became diabetic around this time in his life, and am getting checked. Have a sweet taste in my mouth and a white coating on the tongue sometimes. Always crave sugar and fat...but stress has been high. So sugar and fat are comfort foods. Inherited my dad's sweet tooth and curly hair.
Finally feeling a bit calmer and more in balance lately.
I am not sure I actually believe in it, but I could use a Chakra clearing. Bought a box kit about Chakras with cards, and am thinking to look at it today.
@ghandigirl here’s to an abundance of peace, health and hope. Thank God we all have each other. ❤️☮️
@coyote Here is a clear explanation of the qiqong healing walk. https://youtu.be/nnMnUv5lV5w
The double breath changes the ratio of oxygen to carbon dioxide in your body.
He recommends just 5 minutes a day for starters, building to 15 minutes. When you get used to rhythm, your movements will become smoother.
FYI, Gou Lin, who founded this particular branch of qiqong, reputedly practiced 3.5 hours a day. But 5 minutes is better than no minutes, so a gradual start is fine.
i know you’re dealing with a lot & I hear the fatigue in your posts. If I can make a (small) plug for acupuncture to replenish your energy reserves. Qiqong & acupuncture are interlinked & TCM believes that pharmaceuticals tend in the main to be very yin, thereby draining your energy. I had meningitis many years ago & the primary side effects manifested immediately & the secondary repercussions few years later. I was burnt out, I couldn’t get out of bed, my brains were fried, I lost my sense of direction etc. It took a gifted acupuncturist to figure out my kidney reserves, the storehouse of qi, were down to zero.
With acupuncture, you get a more immediate boost of energy so that you can cope with day-to-day responsibilities & with qiqong, you are restructuring from the cellular level.
i hope this walk helps - just 5 minutes for starters.?
Oh, thanks a lot! This day has been better, energetically. What exactly does "make a plug" for acupuncture mean? I'll see about acupuncturists in my area, but I'll be moving soon, and I'm not sure I can carve out time to see one in the next 3 months.
@coyote I err - I should have said “put in a plug for...” You’re the best judge of your time-energy balance & if you’ve no time for acupuncture, so be it. I figure you can make 5 minutes a day for the qiqong walk? Happy to answer any questions.
I’m sorry you have so much weighing you down right now. You are such a gifted person, and you graciously share your deep wisdom with us here. Please know that you are cared for and prayed for. I hope that your burdens will be lifted from you soon.
Hi all.
A few weeks ago, my job was eliminated due to COVID19. I lost my health insurance, as well. I filed for unemployment, and I applied for Medicaid.
Luckily, I have a reading with Jeanne on Tuesday.
Frankly, I'm at a loss. This wasn't supposed to happen. I was there almost 15 years, and I was planning on staying there until I retired. A bit naive, I know.
Strangely, I am at peace with all this. I know this was nothing personal, but I will need some direction and confirmation from Jeanne. I know I'm an empath and lightworker, so I know I will be okay.
@pacosurfer I’m so sorry to hear about your job loss and I hope you will get some good news soon for your unemployment application and Medicaid. Sometimes the end is just the beginning and this will open the door for something greater. Sending you abundance of prayers.
share the love and light
So sorry @Pacosurfer - so many are going through the same thing. Have you mentioned this to Jeanne? Maybe in light of you recent loss of income she could give you a discount on your reading? (Assuming this was a paid reading, if not, never mind.)
The good news is the $600 unemployment per week COVID relief is on til the end of this month, so you'll get $600 extra per week of unemployment, in addition to the usual benefits. I also believe most states have waived job search requirements for those on UI, check on your state's website.
You have every right to feel lost. You were just set adrift! Thankfully you are taken care of financially, but that can’t compensate for the shock of losing your job. I’m so sorry. I hope this sudden loss will open the way for something new and better than you could imagine.
@pacosurfer, so sorry to read you lost your job. Take time to let it settle. Look around at who you are and where you want to go and you *will* see a path to walk. "It will be better" is a cliche, but it is also true. Maybe there is a job you never considered on the horizon that will bring you much joy.