@sistermoon. I don't know why you haven't seen her. But my gut says that the Collective is so noisy right now. Best time to connect is to use this ritual I was taught years back that worked so well. It's a commitment though, and it may not be a fit for you.
Find a spot in your home for her to meet you. Put a candle there, maybe a photo if you like, or some plant or flowers. (I was told to put a glass of spring water and some sea salt.)
Go to the spot at early part of dawn when the earth energies are switching from yin to yang and are the most quiet and say three things to your departed love one:
1.Thank you.
2. I'm okay.
3. You can go now.
It may take some time, but you will begin to feel them. They may even appear as mine did.
@sistermoon, so sorry for your loss. I hope you can cope in these times... Grief is tough, very tough.
Have you ever taken a look at the Day of the Dead in Mexico? They keep altars to their departed. In China and many other Asian nations they also keep shrines. Perhaps this will help you create a focus point.
As Jeanne already said, it might help to create a place for her to meet you. I made mine to my mother although she is still alive, but to me she is between life and death due to dementia, and I keep her with us in our household like that. I have her picture set up and make a bowl of nature's gifts (went hunting for chestnuts, pine-corns and acorns with my little girl today and made a fall bowl) every season to put in front of the frame as an 'offering' of sorts. A candle is also great and perhaps some incense. Hope it helps and you will be able to get some closure. Keep us posted. ❤️
I hope she visits you soon. I can't advise, but am struck by your worry that you might "have done something wrong." Surely that is impossible. You are completely worthy of her presence. Yet I worry the same thing during a spiritual dry spell. Like I've been "bad" and spirit won't reward me with a sign until I've behaved properly.
There are times when a person passes and they require, for whatever reason, a bit of extra TLC from those on the other side in order to adjust and recover from their physical experience. Once they have recovered, they can usually communicate if 1) they choose to, and 2) it's in the interests of all concerned that they do so. Sometimes the lack of communication is not because we have done anything "wrong" (in my view, there is not really any such thing as doing the "wrong" thing with regard to soul participation agreements made before incarnation), but because it isn't in the best interests of the person still on this side. You may need to learn to not be dependent on that one person/soul; it may be time for a different learning partner/teacher; or you may need to learn how to be your own support system generally. As for "dry spells", again, in my view those are simply periods of study or "hands-on" learning for those of us on this side, and it wouldn't be fair or prudent for those over there to interfere in our lessons or study time. Sometimes you have to go it alone for a bit in order to learn what you need to learn.
Just my 2 cents. :-)
@sistermoon. You thinking you did something wrong reminds me of a visitation that happened in one of my classes a few years ago.
We were tuning into our departed loved ones when one young woman said that her father, who she lost at the tender age of 10, had never appeared, including that night. We were meditating on heirlooms that night, a practice that usually fills the room with the spirits of those who owned them. She had a watch that had belonged to her father, but she got no message from him.
I watched a single tear roll down her cheek as she told us he never appeared. As a ten year old child, she thought she just hadn't been good enough to keep him in this world. He had died involuntarily from a massive heart attack, but that fact didn't prevent a child from believing it was her fault.
But then one of our members who is particularly gifted at seeing spirits, burst out, "He's right here! I see him right next to you!" Keep in mind that the seer, whose name is Judy Swanson, would never make up something like that. Judy is a pure spirit herself and a dear friend. (She's in that book The Gift Within Us where Mary Ann Bohrer listed 33 top psychics, including me.) So Judy was smiling and pointing to him and reading him. "He says you don't have to try so hard. He has always been proud of you."
Moral of the story, it wasn't the departed one who was staying away. It was his daughter who had a block of shame, poor sweet child, so she couldn't see him.
Post script: Happy outcome. This young woman had never had a boyfriend, in spite of being lovely inside and out. After she realized her father truly loved her and was around her, she started a relationship with a young guy that lasted two years. Admittedly it didn't last forever, but at least the barricade to love had lifted. :-)
I was very close to my grandmother. She was like a 2nd parent to me and helped raise me. When she died, I felt like I had lost a part of myself. For weeks after she was gone, my family was in upheaval. i feel to this day many years later that she was with me through alot of the things. I can still remember the dreams I had during that time as well as incidents in the physical world that made me feel like she was with me. After about a month and half, I was really struggling with things and it was taking a hit to my physical health as well. I had one dream where she was upset with me about the fighting in the family and what I was letting happen to myself. I still remember that feeling from her of "Stop It!" and let it go (forgive). It was upsetting to me at the time but it was what started me letting some of my anger go and healing and letting the grief progress continue. Then awhile after that, when I was starting to function again, she came to me in a dream and I can still see it....she told me I was going to be fine and she couldn't stay anymore. She told me she had to go because she other work to do now but she would always love me. To me, I felt her go but at other times in my life when I needed her I felt like she was near again but never quite in the same way as when she first passed. Also, she always told me the stories of the family, keeping people's stories alive. I tried to honor her tradition by working on the family genealogy and letting no one be forgotten. At times I have even felt like I was directed at locations to look for in working on family history and have made some connections I never knew about too. I just feel she is there and maybe not always how I wish she could be but maybe how I need her to be if that makes sense.
I tried to honor her tradition by working on the family genealogy and letting no one be forgotten. At times I have even felt like I was directed at locations to look for in working on family history and have made some connections I never knew about too.
This is interesting to me as I also work on family history. Once of twice I've had a "woo" experience in my research where stuff was "magically" revealed to me.
On the other hand there are a couple of ancestors who really, really seem like they don't want to be found. I meditate to them, telling them I don't care about their shortcomings, I just want to know who they were and what happened to them. Still they are silent.
@sistermoon I believe your grandmother loves you very much and sends her love to you. I use tarot to communicate with spirits. I asked your grandma how she is and I got the World card. When I get this from a spirit it means they are complete, whole, and well. So please do not worry, I believe your grandma is fine. I asked what she is doing on the other side and I got the Queen of Wands card, which to me represents creative pursuits, or just things that she loves and enjoys.
Not all spirits communicate with us through dreams or visits, but their love is with us nonetheless, and I got the Queen of Pentacles card in regards to how she relates to you, which to me is nurturing and loving, like a mother's love.
So I believe your grandma is well, she has transitioned and is complete and whole, she's doing what she enjoys, and she has immense love for you. Keep sending your love her way because for sure she feels it!
@ana I have a few of those too that seem like they just don't want to be found. I have a list of ones that no matter how much research I have done its almost like they never were....if it weren't for pictures and family stories I would begin to doubt they had. One happy moment for me though was that I felt like I was directed toward someone I would have never tried and ended up finding a whole branch of my family. I was able to send them pictures they didn't have that brought them to tears and they visited both cemeteries and record places over seas for me as well as linking me to a parts of my family tree that took me back to the late 1700's. My family history is really like a complicated dramatic soap opera so this help was immeasurable. The hardest part was I wanted to share my findings with my grandmother so badly (even though I know she knows it all now anyway).
My mom always dreams of family members when they suppose to pass away. Last time my grandmother appeared to her in dreams and didn't allow her to come into her old family house (my mom had heart attack back then and was in hospital) but she let my uncle that was suffering of cancer in. She also dreams of grandmother and other deceased family members who warn her sometimes.
Personally it may be my imagination but I always feel weird the day someone passess away and kind of feel like someone is near by. I don't know how to explain but its something like a flicker. Last time I had feeling as if someone came to stand behind me for few seconds and later that day I was informed that my godfater has passed away.
Personally I believe that our relatives are watching over us. Some people just can't receive their message and sometimes that message may not be as clear as it was supposed to be.