The horse got her hay. Iwas going to try the web page tomorrow if nothing happened. I did noyice the roll was a smaller sized than usual, but at least it was hay. I still gave her a treat.
I feel really lame posting in this thread (my troubles are pocket change compared to what some of the others on this forum are going through), but I wasn't sure where else to post this.
I'm experiencing a bit of a crisis at my job. I work at a college and one of my responsibilities is to clear students (my advisees) for graduation. I just cleared one of my advisees for December graduation and sent him notification (this student has been very worried about being set for graduation and I've been providing reassurance as much as possible), when the Registrar called me and informed me that the student is missing a required Math course and is not eligible to graduate. Somehow, I missed this and this student slipped through the cracks. This student will now need to go before a baccalaureate committee with a faculty representative and make his case (and hope that he won't need to take an additional course in order to graduate). The situation isn't entirely my fault, since both of his previous advisors missed that he needed another Math course and I took information from them (where it was indicated that he was all set with his requirements). Also, there is conflicting information published on our college website and our internal templates. All in all, I wouldn't have thought to even look for Math requirements, since there's never been an instance where a student hasn't taken the right number of courses/credits in Math. My boss blames me entirely (haven't received official confirmation of this but he asked to meet with me later today to discuss the situation), and I've been ignoring a gut feeling for months (with this student) that I've been missing something somehow, but I'm not sure that even if I'd paid attention to it, I would know where to look for information I could be missing(?). There doesn't seem to be a real solution aside from: make sure I double check these kinds of requirements in future. I'm so anxious and depressed about the mistake that I've worked myself up and haven't been able to sleep, and I'm concerned that I'm going to lose my job somehow (even though everyone around me keeps saying I won't and that it was an honest mistake, etc.).
All of this points to a larger issue though: my job has become exponentially more demanding over the last several months, and I'm worn out. I feel like I can't keep my energy up in order to be present for my family and everyone at my job. I know that my perfectionism won't allow me to forgive any mistakes, so that hasn't been helping. However, my big fear is that I wouldn't be able to get another job if I lose this one and I feel trapped in the cycle of needing to keep a job in order to support my family. My health insurance is also through my job and it's how I've been able to see a therapist and be on medication and keep my family healthy. I did take a state exam back in April and did so well that I've been receiving continuous canvass letters from the state (invitations to apply to various positions). I had one interview a few months ago but haven't been called back for another interview, even though I feel like it went well. I don't feel like my skills in academia are transferable overall, and all I have to show for my education is a Bachelor of Arts in Music (most people have a master's degree). I can't afford much of a decrease in my salary, either, in order to be able to afford living expenses. The fact that I'm always worried about financial security in the first place and a possible recession (there were huge layoffs here back in the 2009 recession) is compounding things.
Anyway, I just wanted to put this out there (vent) before I meet with my boss later today; I'm feeling cut off from my intuition right now because I'm terrified of this meeting and facing my mistake, and (as usual) I'm worried that my fears of loss are correct yet again. It's also been really hard to tune out the heavy feeling I'm getting in general here in the US- I am worried about my country and was horrified by the UK election results. In general, I feel so powerless and trapped- I don't know what else I could do to resolve any of these situations that seem so far out of my control.
I completely understand how you feel - I have felt the same, not wanting to post or feeling like my problems are not as bad as others, so why complain to anyone (either here or to people in my life.) It doesn't matter! It is weighing you down and causing you stress, so it is worthwhile to ask for some support. We have had the same struggles re: feeling caught in the catch-22 of the salary level you currently need, but wanting to switch jobs, etc. It sounds like you are probably OK at your job - just nervous about the mistake? Maybe try some grounding meditation? Deep breaths, envisioning a grounding "cord" going from your head all the way down to your spine, deep into the center of the earth, anchoring there. Just breath and let all of that worry and tension drain into the earth to be absorbed and transmuted. Then visualize some wonderful, golden cosmic light coming into your head and filling you with calm.
I hope your meeting with the boss goes well and can reassure you that this was an honest mistake. And hopefully a solution can be found for the student so all is well. Sending you some calming light and steadiness. Hang in there!
This isn't earth shaking, but since nothing much is going on, I thought I'd ask.My parents died in 1974; three days apart. Mother at 62 of a stroke, and Daddy at 69 of a heart attack. Anyway, before Mother died, she and my aunt went on a cruise. They took pictures. I don't have them anymore (after two fires). but they were odd. Mother was blurry in most of them, even when other people in the picture were normal. I always thought that she was surrounded by angels, and that was why she was blurry. So could you tell me, if that could be correct?
Happy Holiday Everyone! Here's a video from Enya and Our Earth:
CLICK HERE (not the image)
or CLICK THIS LINK: https://www.flixxy.com/we-wish-you-a-merry-christmas-and-a-happy-new-year-by-enya.htm
I completely understand how you feel - I have felt the same, not wanting to post or feeling like my problems are not as bad as others, so why complain to anyone (either here or to people in my life.) It doesn't matter! It is weighing you down and causing you stress, so it is worthwhile to ask for some support. We have had the same struggles re: feeling caught in the catch-22 of the salary level you currently need, but wanting to switch jobs, etc. It sounds like you are probably OK at your job - just nervous about the mistake? Maybe try some grounding meditation? Deep breaths, envisioning a grounding "cord" going from your head all the way down to your spine, deep into the center of the earth, anchoring there. Just breath and let all of that worry and tension drain into the earth to be absorbed and transmuted. Then visualize some wonderful, golden cosmic light coming into your head and filling you with calm.
I hope your meeting with the boss goes well and can reassure you that this was an honest mistake. And hopefully a solution can be found for the student so all is well. Sending you some calming light and steadiness. Hang in there!
I just wanted to post a follow-up to this situation. First off, thank you very much for your reassurance and advice- this was so helpful, especially going into my conversation with my boss. Ultimately, things are ok (I'm going to have to work on a performance plan with my boss, but that seems like a thing that should happen either way). If anything, this incident has highlighted that our degree clearance process requires some major changes and that I'm vulnerable as the only person ultimately responsible (a situation I'm not comfortable with and want to change ASAP before another mistake could be made). I've also been thinking that at this time in my life, I want a more stable situation than this. I already feel deeply unsafe thanks to the chaos taking place in the US right now and the impending climate change consequences, and what's most important to me is my family and providing the stability they need (especially for my young daughter). I'd really like a stable job with predictable work and regular, family-friendly hours. I know it will take some time to be able to find a suitable job, but in the meantime I find I have no energy and that I'm always burning the candle at both ends (and feeling vulnerable). I've always hated the fact that I'm a slave to my job since my benefits and livelihood basically exist solely because of it. I don't expect this dynamic to change for the better anytime soon. Anyway, thanks again for your response!
I am glad my response was helpful. I will keep you in my good thoughts for strength and patience as you look for a more suitable job!
After 13 years, our beloved pup is scheduled to go over the rainbow today at 2pm. Cancer moved fast and I thought we had more time. Our children will be heartbroken. This has been a year of loss for us. After loosing our Linda, this will surely be another heart pain that takes time to heal.
I’m battling playing god to end a life of someone I love. I know she’s in unbearable pain but there’s a part of me that worries she could magically get better. Suffering is such a hard thing to witness, when eyes and cuddles are the only form of communication we share with our fur babies.
Im worried sick about my children, especially my son. His tender heart combined with his connection for this animal is something I can’t fix. Only time can.
Please send my family positive healing. They could use all the light you have.
This month is a rocky ride.
Aw, I am so sorry about this. I feel your heartbreak. Our pets are among the most loving and beautiful beloved ones in our lives. Please be gentle with yourselves.