@frank and @ghandigirl
Your daughter is feeling angry and guilty and the two are feeding into each other in a vicious cycle. She is feeling guilty about not contacting you, which in turn makes her angry because she blames you for the situation. She wants to contact you but is afraid that it will open up old wounds and reinforce old patterns and thus she just becomes more angry and more guilty about the situation. If you can, I would send her a brief note just telling her you love her and hope she is staying safe. Keep it simple and focused on your love for her.
I was mediating on your daughter and was about to type something very similar to what Frank was picking up when I saw his response to you! I think Frank's advice about keeping it simple and brief and just telling her you love her and hope she is safe is spot on. ?
Hmm I just texted her that question and SHE RESPONDED that she has not been tested for a fungal infection! It's a start!
Thank you for looking at this!
(She is a kind and wonderful person and was once voted Volunteer of the year in our town because she is always helping others before herself, so I would love to be able to help her for sure)
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Hello everyone, I've been avoiding the forum for the past little while as I've been going through a rough time for the past couple of months. I had to go through a medication change. They took me off something called Trintellix and added Wellbutrin to my "cocktail" it went downhill from there. I went to the hospital to get stabilized and they made more meds changes adding abilify, eliminating the restoril all together (60mg) and replacing it with rivotril. As a result, I'm in physical pain, and an emotional wreck. This is tough, but it's not my first rodeo and I can get through this and be stronger in the end.
I didn't want to add to the hardship everyone has been going through with COVID-19. The city had the main regional COVID-19 clinic in the same hospital I was in, just one section over. No worries, I was not exposed in anyways to the virus. In fact the new cases in Quebec City are very far and few between. Mind you most businesses are closed. In a province of 8.4 millions, 500,000 people lost their jobs last week. We are expecting at least another 750,000 layoffs this week. and a lot more in the next couple of weeks to come. Schools are closed until at least May. They may write off the whole year. But on a positive note, there is a state television working on having teaching capsules for grade school students starting next week. I will also teach English to my 4 nieces, remotely.
I'm skirting the issue here, Yesterday morning, I witness a suicidal scene. The person who was suffering from mental health issues threw himself off a bridge after violently attacking a nurse in a mental health facility in town, then ran away. He got to the bridge beside my apartment which is some ways from the center of the city, and threw himself off the bridge. As I was leaving the driveway from my apartment I saw the scene. I was shocked. I immediately started praying for God and the angels to guide his spirit towards the light. But I don't think I was successful. I didn't feel it happening, I felt blocked. I continued on with my day, probably trying to block the memory of it all. But today is so difficult. I wonder if the man didn't attach himself to me somehow. I just want to cry and I don't now what to do. I don't think I am meant to handle these things. I don't have what is needed for this.
I don't know what to do. I feel so tired, weak and I feel like crying all the time which I don't usually do.
Can someone tell me what to do, because I am so lost. so tired. And angry he choose my little corner of the world to do this. I know it's selfish, but I can't help how I feel...
You are dong the right thing, you are reaching out for help. That is the most important descion you can make. Being empathic, the stress regarding this pandemic and the changes in your medicine will all play a role in how you are processing this vey sad and tragic event. This is normal and your feelings are totally understandable. I repeat, your feelings and how you are processing this are completely normal.
Can you come to the meditation we are holding tomorrow night? That might be a wonderful gift to give yourself. We can send you healing energy that way too in addition to sending it now as we read your post.
Also, continue to communicate with your doctors. Do you have access to friends or professionals that you can speak with about what has been happening?
You are loved and I am so glad you reached out.
I will be sending prayers and love to you.
Hello, all,
I'd like your help. The EMTs just left, after I had a bit of a scare. I think that I had a horrible reaction to something that I ate for dinner. My heart began to race and my tongue felt slightly thick, so I broke open a liquid Benadryl capsule and took that. Almost immediately my heart sped up, I felt burning in my chest and had the worst headache of my life. My husband called 911. After the medics came and checked me out, they said it was not anaphylactic shock because my blood pressure was very high and my pulse was about 115. My oxygen level was also at 100%. They said that based on my description, I also had a hypertensive headache. They did an EKG, which looked normal to them. My blood pressure is usually normal or below normal.
They didn't see any cause for alarm, but said they'd take me to the hospital if I wanted to go. They also offered to stay with me until my blood pressure returned to normal, and I felt better. The EMT thought the burning in my chest was in my esophagus, perhaps even caused by the Benadryl. He thought that because I broke open the capsule and took the liquid that way, it could have had almost a caustic effect going down. I decided to have the EMTs stay with me, and my blood pressure and pulse returned to normal.
An interesting comment was made by the head EMT -- he believed that I did have a bad reaction to food, but wondered whether the stress everyone is now under put me over the edge. He's been seeing it a lot lately. He also said that fewer people want to be taken to the ER. The hospital they would have taken me to is a big trauma center.
I feel better, but crappy -- headache (now feels like a hangover), still some burning in the chest area, and buzzing (anxious). I'd appreciate anything you can offer -- insights, healing light, prayers -- and that I have a restful night.
Thank you, everyone.
im having trouble with my diet, but one of my niece’s is an addict. I texted to see how she was doing and she was in an online meeting taking place in Iceland! I was so glad to hear that. She is in gratitude daily and I think we all should be. So don’t beat up yourself, just start over. ?
Anita
@lovendures Thank you. I was planning on being there. As you can imagine, I feel all alone. Still I am well supported. This is just the kind of things I an't really be talking to anyone about. But tomorrow will be very helpful, I agree.
If you know how to get rid of a "stickler" who won't pass over, I could use the knowledge. But I'm certain he will leave me alone tomorrow after our meditation. Or maybe I'm the one who won't leave him alone...
Everyone, I know we are all going through a difficult time, we all need help. I wish I could help you all, I just don't know how anymore. But it gives me strength to help others.
@Deetoo , I will keep you in my prayers. If I can't sleep, I'll pray you are able to, If I do sleep, I'll try to reach you in my dreams so we can find an angelic dove to guide us toward peaceful rest!
Good night!
I have been feeling a combined wave of sadness, anger and loss. I don't know what the next best step is and have been tired. If anyone could help, would be appreciated. I feel like I have somehow landed on another planet with yoga pants, snobbery disguised as generosity, big business, and mediocrity rules...or at least is most common.
I am also feeling grief regarding the needless suffering that could have been averted.
I tell myself I am grateful for what I have, but I just desperately wish everything could be different, more harmonious, and more beautiful.
I have been pressing the Shen Men acupuncture point on my ear when I remember, but it's just been a bit too crazy for too long. I need things to lift.
To me it just feels very hard to process what is going on and how people are reacting. I have sent out healing to the world, but I can't seem to hang on to it myself.
I am so sorry that you experienced this. It is a truly distressing thing to witness. I don’t think there is a right or wrong way to feel, whether it is being shocked, tired, weak, teary or angry or even numb.
I am wondering if you feel calling a crisis helpline could help? I believe that they can help when you have been impacted. For example here: Crisis Services Canada at phone: 1.833.456.4566 | or Text 45645
I think that there is also no right or wrong way to seek help. You certainly are not burdening me with your post, and in fact you are showing me how to reach out and seek help when I need it - something I have personally struggled with. I am grateful that you reached out here.
I am thinking of you and sending you love. Hugs.
@bright-opal, you are so very kind. Thank you so much for your support.
What you experienced was quite traumatic. I am so glad that you shared this with us. Have you cried at all, or do you feel like you want to but can't? I remember decades ago when I was on my way to work, I witnessed someone hit by a car. He tried to stand up, and because his legs were probably broken, his body collapsed. Remarkably an EMT was nearby, and she rushed to his aid. i then boarded my bus and went to work, in a very dissociated state. I could share the story of what I witnessed, but felt totally detached from it. Back then dissociation was the way I usually coped with trauma. Perhaps you're still processing what you witnessed, which is why you might feel the presence of that person. There is no right or wrong way to feel when you experience something like that. It was a big shock to your nervous system.
I'm glad you're planning on joining tomorrow's meditation. Allow yourself to receive the healing, comfort and support of the group. We are your tribe, and we love you.
I've just given you a big hug ... I can feel us embracing each other, my head on your shoulder, yours on mine. I am sending you prayers for a peaceful sleep.