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Women rising and gender issues

(@jeanne-mayell)
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This is where people can talk about gender issues. 



   
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 pafc
(@pat-czap)
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I saw the best t-shirt in a shop at Detroit Metro airport the other day...on the front of this child size shirt ...THE FUTURE IS FEMALE.



   
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 pafc
(@pat-czap)
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@ana I'm sorry if this touched on a sore spot for emotions.  I can totally agree with what you have written with regards to some boys and young men.  I am the mom to 3 grown men and 3 young grandsons.  I have not heard such comments from my sons when we talk about how things are in this world.  I will refrain from posting such things in the future.  My apologies to you, and others who may have been affected by my post.



   
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(@autisticanthony)
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@pat-czap I never interpreted "The future is female" to be exclusive of men/boys.

Rather, I think the intent of the slogan is to visualize a world where women have an equal place at the table...where viable female candidates on the ballot are no longer a rarity, but a mainstay.  Where male candidates aren't automatically given deference just because they're male.

Of course, there are some who'd want to take the slogan literally and turn it into a misandrist society where women run everything in the name of "turning the tables on" men.  But I don't believe that's what a majority of people (of any gender) actually want.



   
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 gbs
(@gbs)
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I wanted to clarify that when I see the rise of feminine energy, it's not at the expense of male energy. If women had run the world so unilaterally across human history as men have done, we'd have equally as many problems as we do now. Maybe different ones, but problems nonetheless. (Think of Kari Lake, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Lauren Broebert, to name a few.)

It's the balance of feminine and masculine energies that holds the key to positive change, in my opinion. And just because women have more opportunities, doesn't mean that men are automatically sidelined. But men shouldn't expect default opportunities in future, based solely on their gender. There has to be room for everyone–male, female, non-binary, etc. to advance and grow.



   
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(@jeanne-mayell)
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@ana @pat-czap. Both of you have beautiful heart-felt reasons for your thoughts, and all of us are evolving right now. A natural reaction to improving a world dominated by male energies, is to hail the rise of women.  The scales have been so heavily weighted towards the masculine, we need a lot of feminine energy to bring us back to balance. Please don't feel you need to apologize, @pat-czap, for hailing the rise of women, although it is so kind of you to do so.

@Ana, thank you for reminding us. I too have a son and he has oodles of empathic caring energy, as does my husband, his father. We are so blessed that way. Years ago, I read and loved the book Real Boys, by William Pollack that asserted that the toxic conceptions of masculinity in boy culture leads to boys doing poorly in education and health and having higher involvement in violent crimes and suicide than girls, as well as gearing our business and political leadership towards toxic power and winning at all costs.  Our culture conditioned boys to be unfeeling, tough, in a way that is not what a naturally healthy masculine psyche is meant to be. 

So when I speak of the rise of the feminine, I think of it as the divine feminine, or the rise of empathic caring qualities in a person, not that they have to be a man or a woman to make that happen in our world. 

But as @ana has pointed out, we need to find more gender inclusive vernacular for the return of caring values in our culture than just calling it the rise of women.



   
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(@lowtide)
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We humans seem to want to distill ideas, spirituality, divine truths and everything else into short catch phrases. "The future is female" strikes me that way.  I understand it the way Jeanne explains it. Others may see it as a slam against men and be offended. That's the problem with catchy slogans! 



   
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(@ana)
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@pat-czap   I'm not offended or hurt-- no need to apologize.  

While we need a lot more "feminine" energy in the world, we should not forget the need for the masculine to balance it.  It's all a matter of balance.



   
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(@ana)
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Posted by: @jeanne-mayell

But as @ana has pointed out, we need to find more gender inclusive vernacular for the return of caring values in our culture than just calling it the rise of women.

Yes, yes yes.  

To me and my son, the phrase "The future is female" carries the implication that there is no place for men in the future. 

We need balance. We need the best of female energy and the best of male energy working in concord.

 Men and boys-- particularly impressionable young men and boys-- should not (even inadvertently) be made to feel they are "bad" or "toxic" because of their gender.  

 



   
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(@thebeast)
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@ana 

Just as the world beyond is ruled by a man standing on the shoulders of a giant woman, so shall this world be ruled by a woman standing on the shoulders of a giant man.



   
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(@unk-p)
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Posted by: @ana

While we need a lot more "feminine" energy in the world, we should not forget the need for the masculine to balance it.  It's all a matter of balance.

i think the world has been tilted to the so-called masculine for sooooo long now, that even a babies cheeky t-shirt slogan can feel like a threat to that "order"  -the system that is driving us to extinction does not appreciate being challenged.

 It will be up to you to elucidate the difference to your sons, between what is beautiful masculine energy, vs the toxic kind.  I recently saw another baby-t that said "I'm too clumsy to be around all this fragile masculinity!", and it cracked me up. (I am a guy).  Just like Black Lives Matter does not mean that other lives don't matter, or any of the twisted ways that small minded people try to misinterpret it.  And they will misinterpret it~ but we are not required to do that for them.

Every baby starts out female. The Earth is Female.  And the Future, if we choose to have one, will be Female!

and i am here for it



   
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(@autisticanthony)
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Posted by: @polarberry

@unk-p 

I adore ya, you know that?

I have three sons, two adult and one still teen. None of them are offended or frightened by the future is female. We've always teased and joked in our household about how men are genetically programmed from birth to leave dirty underwear on the floor, watch out for women drivers, ect, but I have never allowed serious gender bashing of either sex. I love all my boys and have an amazing husband and if women are to start having more power, I say about damned time and so do they!

They were all raised to respect women, and I have told them all I expect them to marry women who respect them for the decent men they are. Win-win!

@polarberry -- it sounds like what you're describing is how there are very real "gendered" differences between women and men...although those differences certainly fluctuate depending on variances in sexual orientation, gender identity, gender energy, etc.

Because I'm gay, a lot of people automatically assume I'm going to be able to relate better to women.  While it's true that I value friendships with women, there's also something very beautiful and distinct about sharing brotherhood with other men who value the sort of "nutric masculinity" that I tend to promote.



   
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(@saibh)
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We've had a number of conversations about this at my house. My husband was raised very traditional, in a very religious home, with very traditional gender roles and expectations. I was raised by hippies, and my mom was a single mom for awhile, so "girl power" was always taught. I have a son who went through gifted programs in school growing up, half the class was biologically female, and he saw there were just as smart and capable - if not more so - girls than the biologically male half of class. He was also raised by a feminist mother ;) My daughter is lgbtq+, dating a gender fluid kiddo who goes by he/they. Conversations about "female," "feminine," "masculinity," "toxic masculinity" are always a great learning experience for us all.

To say the future is female is a rallying cry for girls and women who have struggled to break glass ceilings, were told they couldn't be certain jobs or have certain aspirations, whose voices were disregarded or disrespected, whose very rights had to be fought into existence and continue to be debated and negated to this day. I get it and I applaud it and hope there is truth to it. On the other hand, there are valid and needed male voices (biologically or identify as) in the world, too, and the future belongs to them, as well. We have gotten where we are while, as RGB said, having the necks of half this world stood upon by the other half in an attempt to push them down and keep them "in their place." Women deserve to be a part of the future, and might just do a better job. But I feel more comfortable saying that the future is "feminine," because I look at people like Marjorie Traitor Gee and Lauren Boebunny and see them turning themselves inside out to gain the power of men by mirroring the men they perceive to be in power. I do not get "feminine" energy from either of them. To me, "feminine" is nurturing, warm, protective, compassionate, egalitarian, patient ... whether in a male or female body.



   
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(@lovendures)
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@saibh 

Agree! Feminine is a better fit than female. It is feminine energy. We need both energies but we have been living under the masculine energy for so long, it is time for an energetic change.



   
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(@deetoo)
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I love this thread and what everyone has shared here.  For the past few years my husband has often remarked, "it's going to take the women to save us."  What he means is a return to feminine energy -- one that is collaborative, nurturing, accepting, intuitive, and compassionate.  It's flowing and dynamic, and is guided from the heart.  

I find it curious how much the toxic masculine energy has risen over the years, especially with the election of TFG.  It's really a caricature of what healthy masculine energy should be.  We need the best parts of both to move us forward most effectively.



   
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(@polarberry)
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@autisticanthony 

Exactly!

It's exactly like unk said; the people who lose their sh*t over BLM don't get it. It's not that white lives don't matter or all lives don't matter; of course they do. The message is that black lives matter just as much as other lives. But that message threatens the racists who, obviously, don't agree with that.

So funny you said that! I love men, always have. My whole life, my closest friends have mostly been male. I just seem to get along better with men. They're just easier in so many ways, less complicated I guess. I always like to joke that when men get mad, they beat the crap out of each other, shake hands, have a beer and call it good.

Regarding the whole man/woman thing...I consider my husband the head of our home and family....having said that, he has never, ever told me what to do or how to think or that I can't do something or go somewhere....for one, if he ever tried it, good luck to him! Just kidding, but he would never do that. In return, we make decisions together and I don't belittle him as a man. Too many women these days do that, I think. You know, that whole if momma ain't happy bs. We're partners. I don't want my sons to ever be ashamed of their gender any more than I want my daughter thinking she can't do something because of hers. 

The rise of women can't and shouldn't come at the expense of men, but then no man who is secure in himself is threatened by a powerful woman, imo. I absolutely loved seeing Doug Emhoff on election night. He loves his wife and is proud of her and you can just tell that they love and support each other. Awesome! 

 

 



   
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(@lovendures)
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Having surgery or need medical care?  You might want to make sure there are plenty of women on your medical team.

The latest evidence,  published Wednesday in the British Journal of Surgery, finds that surgical teams with more women see fewer health complications among patients than male-dominated teams.

Also, a study published last month found that women treated by female physicians were less likely to die or be readmitted to the hospital compared to those treated by male physicians. The same was true for elderly hospitalized patients treated by female internists, according to a 2017 study.

Some of the reasons this may be true? Women doctors have longer visits with their patients, interrupt patients less often, give preventative care and adhere to medical guidelines more than their male counterparts.  

Hmmm...

https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-care/female-doctors-patients-lower-risk-death-complications-rcna151968

 



   
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(@tgraf66)
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I knew there was a reason all of the doctors I've chosen are women. ;-)



   
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(@cindy)
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My father's current doctor is female. It's the first time in decades we've gotten his diabetes under control, and with his other comorbidities, it's at a time when we should actually be losing a grip on control. Speaks volumes. 

I was not surprised when I read this the other day. I still recall being in the maternity ward with my youngest. When I got to the ward, the receptionist asked what kind of room I wanted-private, semi-private? My answer was delivery. A few nurses came running. The doc examined me and asked why I felt I needed delivery, I wasn't even fully dilated. I gave him a look I assume he was familiar with (unfortunately), as he stopped asking questions immediately. He broke my water and was amazed to find that I was minutes away from delivering. He apologized that at this late stage there was nothing he could do to make it easier on me. I don't think a female doctor would have second guessed another woman like that. I'll never forget it. 



   
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(@kathleen)
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@saibh What you say rings true, thank you for sharing your thoughts. By the time we've grown to adulthood, the gender mix in most countries that do not practice infanticide based on sex is about 52% female to 48% male. There are several reasons for this, but what is of interest to me is how women comprise the majority of the population but are so disenfranchised in ways that involve power, money and control. And that may be in part because women do not generally wield power, money and control in the same ways that men do. Getting things done through collaboration, equality and respect is the direction that I hope for the future, whatever energy it takes to get it us there.



   
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