There are times I have felt compassion for trumpsters, including my sister. With her birthday next week, I battle with whether I contact her. I know that one moment I may feel compassion, however, I may quickly regret such contact. I don’t feel the strength to be able to deal with all that supporting him entails....approving of kids in cages, tax breaks for the wealthy while everyone else suffers, undoing regulations to keep us safer, lying non stop, calling people names, putting unqualified people into positions of power, his love for dictators, his selling out our country, moves against women, civil, lgbtq rights. I’m no saint.
Anita
Saint or no saint, the spirit knows when the truth is spoken. Bless all people who speak truth. I dont know how to fix this world, but it has to start with speaking the truth
Hi Anita,
Maybe just send your sister a birthday card. Then you have done something positive that doesn’t need to devolve into anything contentious. I constantly have to walk this line with certain family members and it is difficult. I’m trying not to compromise my beliefs but at least maintain minimal ties to people who I know aren’t inherently evil until this storm passes. Good luck!
I’ve been watching this remarkable British detective series on PBS called Unforgotten, about the solving of cold cases. It is helping me with the issues we are discussing about the criminals in politics, who are not murderers, but have caused unspeakable pain and committed other crimes against our country.
Each set of episodes begins with a murder victim who died decades earlier, followed by five episodes in which they find suspects until they solve the case.
There are usually several suspects and you as viewer go through the shifts in perspective as the detectives uncover the truth.
Your perspective of the suspects changes from suspicion that they are evil to a more human view of them as the detectives uncover their stories.
People falter. They hurt people, mostly innocently, and then there sometimes is a true perpetrator out there who is a sociopathic force of darkness. I feel that way about the dark money politicians and their enablers. Most are motivated by their own pain, then some are sociopaths.
I struggle with all of this—with uncovering the dark out there and the dark in myself that arises when I judge.
As an empath, I sometimes don’t know where I end and others begin. I want to stop the pain out there because it flows through me. I believe that like the trees, I'm feeling their need and sending healing. But if my own thinking is off, then I suffer.
When the GOP leadership is about to launch an attack, I feel it like a great dark force rising up, like a blackening storm system moving in.
I often react first with fear, then judgement and anger.
But those feelings work like poison in me.
Anger also keeps us weak. It reaffirms a belief that those people are separate from us, but whether we like it or not, their feelings, their judgements, flow through us and are within us. We will all be better off if we can see them in all their complexity.
Meanwhile the detectives in Unforgotten still have to find the perpetrators and bring them to justice.
But the truth of people is rarely black and white. And it gives me more comfort to see the light in people than to close my heart to them.
Still I falter and I wish I didn’t have to keep learning the same lesson over and over again, like Sisyphous pushing that rock up the hill only to have it roll back down again and again. It's an ongoing struggle to love.
While I was writing my post, Anita’s, Unk and Deetoo’s popped up. Anita, my heart goes out to you. You are such a beautiful soul. Along with UnkP and Deetoo’s responses I am so grateful for this community. And laura thank you for your beautiful honesty. I resonate with you too. Feelings are complex.
Baba,
Even sending a birthday card feels like too much. That’s sad and difficult to admit.
i feel she is throwing me under the bus. She doesn’t believe in gay marriage and I’m married to a woman. It’s worse by being personal....
Anita
Hi Anita,
I’m so sorry that your sister is so closed-minded. If she causes you that much pain, then by all means protect yourself and don’t engage. I guess you could pray that she opens her heart. In any case, whatever she does is on her and not you. There are also toxic people in my family. When they attack me, I tell myself that I can only control my behavior, not theirs. As painful as it is, I guess this is one of the lessons in our life that we have to learn or repeat in the next one (if you believe in reincarnation). I’m sending light to you in the hopes that you find a solution that will give you peace.
Am I the only one who feels like some of these threads need to be collected in book form and printed for posterity?
Nope. You’re not the only one, Coyote. There are times when I want to find some gem of wisdom that I’ve read in one of the posts, and have a difficult time finding it. Such an insightful community from which to learn and grow.
Anita,
When it’s personal, it’s very painful and complicated. I honestly don’t know how I would respond if I were in your shoes. I pray you will find an answer that gives you peace. Whatever you decide, please be kind to yourself.
Thank you, Baba. I could pray she opens her mind. I know I need to pray for me to be more forgiving of her and myself.
Anita