@april You are not alone. I feel it and I know so many others who do, too. It's akin to the pressure of a gathering storm.
@april, I understand how you feel. I've felt that way a lot lately. That's when I have to remind myself, It is okay if you're exhausted. That exhaustion comes when you care deeply about a world that's topsy turvy. And it is more than okay to give yourself a break -- turn off the news, walk among the trees, laugh, dance, sing -- do whatever gives you joy and recalibrates your body, mind and spirit. Accept what is, but remain hopeful. It ain’t over.
@dannyboy said something in a recent post that I love: allow me (us) to carry you through this time as you have carried us. We are kindred spirits, in service to one another – sharing our joys and sorrows, drawing on each other’s strengths when needed, and walking this mysterious journey of life together.
As for me … I’m a senior gal who has decided to ride the wave, live my remaining life as honorably as I can, and do whatever I can to spread the good stuff.
@april I feel it right now but not as strongly as I did pre-indictment. We're building toward something again and I'm just grateful I have the next 5 weeks to finish off the school year - I'm so busy right now winding this year down and prepping the next that I haven't been able to let myself feel it as hard as I did the last bout. Hang in there! We're all with you!
I’ve been feeling the intensity and want to reassure everyone that we were in the midst of unexpectedly intense solar flares the last 48 hours, we’re in the middle of Mercury Retrograde, and we are approaching a Lunar Eclipse in Scorpio (whew!) on Friday. Hang in there and try to find the magic in the fact that we are all connected to each other and feeling these influences!
I wasn't sure where to put this but I think I need prayers and positive energy more than anything right now. My husband is running for a local office in a small town and he is the endorsed Democratic candidate. His opponent was quite upset he was endosed and not her so she is using a scorched earth tactic to try to destroy him. I mean its a small town, not a national election. ....its insane the amount of vitriol she is using. She creating scandal out of thin air, truly we are good people. She is even dragging kids into it. Call me naive but I thought kids were off limits. The next thing I am hearing is she going to release a commercial slandering him. in a small town. a commercial? Imagine how much money that will cost! I feel like we are fighting for the soul of this town. How did politics get like this? And we are all supposedly democrats.
What does this mean for the national elections if it is like this at the local level. If the democrats are turning on each other and using Maga tactics to win? At this point I don't even care if we win, I just want my life to go back to normal and not have to deal with this stress of having our characters constantly attacked to the extreme. Please send prayers and advice.....it's been hard.
@theredone I wouldn' t worry too much. People do get carried away by ambition. But sooner or later the universe rebalances itself. And all the harm done is repaid in good deeds.
Frequently, toxic people get entangled so much by their own webs of meanness and lies that they trip and fall all by themselves.
If that lady wants to nail you and your family to a cross, it is demeaning to her, not to you.
Look at what she did, in her greed she placed you and your family in the higher moral ground. And you can take it if you wish to. When she hits you, you don't run away. You stand your ground. And you turn the other cheek. Treat her with kindness and empathy. You will disarm her with your smile. It is tough to get beaten and not hit back. Just take it one minute at the time. The more you try it, the easier it gets. You can make it if you try.
Everything will turn out all right. I will hold you and your family in prayer.
@theredone Yes, these Trumpian tactics have entered local politics. Not just in your town, sadly. I agree it is best to take the high road, while correcting any lies. You and your husband will feel better if you stay clean but do find a way to correct the record.
I don't know what to say to lessen your burden except to say I am wishing your husband protection. And strength to get through a tricky patch. It is disappointing our politics have been usurped by grown brat babies. This too shall pass.
You have both my deepest sympathy and support. When I was a teenager, my family was in a similar position when my father was superintendent of a school system in the south which he was asked to racially integrate. We faced intense vitriol and death threats over a period of months and finally moved away, leaving a house we had just renovated but never got to live in. My parents even feared for my life.
My father was lied about, denounced on the radio and in the newspaper so I know full well that it is hard to stay philosophical about that sort of ill will and misrepresentation. You all have to do what is best for your family, but your husband is badly needed so if you can find the inner resources, I hope you all will see it through. One hopes post-election, the sailing will get smoother.
It takes courage and fortitude especially for one who is sensitive to what is around her. Blessings ❤️
Thank you all for your support. I have felt better since I read all your comments. I knew it was going to be a time a of karmic energy because about a week before he annonced, a few weird things happened. One night, randomly in the week hours of the morning, my alarm clock went off with an alarm i had never heard before. A few nights after that, my husbands alarm clock went off randomly in the wee hours (I can't remember the time). THEN, a few nights after that, I had a lucid dream where there were shadowy things in my room, but I looked up and there was a bright spot light shining down on us in the bed..it was really bright and lit up my whole room and the shadowy creatures scampered because they couldn`t hide with all the light shining down. So I took this to mean that we were in the spotlight and the negative couldn't last for long in that amount of light.
Hi gang!
I try not to pester for my own self but in this particular case, I need some light sent my way.
I've been exceptionally lucky in education my entire life. I had one principal for most of my time in the classroom, and after moving to my central office role, I've had one supervisor - until last school year. The new person they brought in was a former superintendent of one of our locals and she had a bit of a shady, checkered past. Very right wing, very anti-union, and very much a "my way or the highway" lady.
We haven't butted heads often but she does continue to misrepresent our work (truthfully my position is so weird it's hard for ME to wrap my brain around sometimes, so I try to give her the benefit of the doubt) - but she's also put me in some difficult situations, the most recent of which was yesterday.
She came in and wanted to have a chat with me. That's fine - growth mindset - hear the feedback. The conversation went to two disturbing places that I've gotten the impression have been things she's been trying to figure out for awhile.
First - she said the way I describe my work to people is "off-putting." - when I asked for examples, she gave me two. A recent e-mail I sent to the 10 directors who share me updating them on my work. She said I dropped the line "I'm sorry this is a day late, I've been swamped." - she told me "We're all swamped Dannyboy, no one wants to hear you say it too, we know what you do." This didn't sound like a "me" problem because I've known the other directors for years and I reviewed 3 months worth of emails and determined I didn't actually use that language. The second example she gave me was when meeting a new Superintendent. The woman asked me what I did, and I told her the 3 primary hats I wear across 10 different organizations. Doing this apparently makes me sound closed off and unavailable even though every teacher, principal, or superintendent who has reached out to me in 12 years has received nearly instant responses.
I can easily think on this and try not to be a human when communicating with people but the second part has me in a tailspin right now.
My work contract has me working a certain number of hours per week (i'm a union position!) - Because I'm shared I have to be flexible in when I do my work - it involves anywhere between 4-12 hours of evening classes for teachers I'm leading a week. Teachers not just in my immediate vicinity but across the whole state (because I work across the whole state!) - For the 12 years I've done this job, that's always been our mantra - meet them where they are and revise your schedule accordingly. So if I teach a 4 hour course in the evening on Wednesday, I leave at noon on Friday. Teach two of them I don't even come in on Friday because no one wants us Fridays anyway.
I got the "people are talking" talk about that. There's only one new "people" in our office and that's her, so I know exactly who the "people" are. I believe this is an opening foray into a larger issue that might rear its head next year. I went through my calendar of booked appointments for next year after school already and have adjusted when I'm taking the days - but I was left with the distinct impression that it wasn't about the equality of the time, it was about power and control.
Tongue in cheek, I left the conversation with the conclusion that when people ask what I do I need to say "Oh, this and that but never on a Friday" instead of telling them what I actually do. :-)
I'm in a tailspin right now mentally because I don't know what to do. If anyone has some light and love you can send my way (and maybe even her's to help her become more compassionate and understanding) I'd greatly appreciate the lift. I'm so sorry to vent my frustrations here, but in 21 years in the field I've never needed to activate my union and I'm doing it here to at least see what my options are but - people from her former district tell me she's very retaliatory and I'm in no mood to have my days regularly ruined out of spite.
@dannyboy Gaslighting bosses/supervisors are the effing worst. I think most of us have had them. If you feel misunderstood and humiliated it's not you, it's them. No good supervisor makes others feel that way. This person is trying to make you doubt yourself and is playing mind games with you. I'm sorry this is happening. It's a form of psychological abuse not often given the attention in our society that it deserves.
I'll keep good thoughts for you, @dannyboy, but I also have a suggestion. Buy yourself a "banishing candle." You can get them on Amazon. When you light it think to yourself, "I wish you well, away from me," then think good things about your tormentor, but see them moving on to something better away from you. I've done this in the past and it's worked for me. I think it's a form of manifesting where you are wishing well for all parties, and that may be why it works. Even if it doesn't, you'll feel like you're taking spiritual action, and action always makes us feel empowered.
I wish the best for you, and I've been there, buddy. It sucks but you're a bright light, and the universe will bring you what you deserve.
@dannyboy It feels like walking through a minefield when you get a new boss. You've been in that job a long time, you and your colleagues understand each other, and here comes someone to upset the applecart.
Sounds like she doesn't appreciate the casual, collegial approach and prefers a more professional approach. If she were my boss, I would always meet deadlines!
I think it's going to be a struggle for you two to appreciate each other. You seem to me to be an extrovert who sees the larger view, and she may be an introvert who focuses on the details.
You have a way with people, and I'll bet you can find commonalities with her and eventually win her over. Try not to be offended. Don't participate when others talk about her behind her back. Work on establishing a good relationship with her.
Then after work, toss that rock with her name on it into the air and watch it turn into a dove and fly far away, as a wise person in this community suggested as a meditation. And burn that banishing candle, as suggested by @lynn.
I hope it gets less upsetting and burdensome for you, @dannyboy! ❤️
Then after work, toss that rock with her name on it into the air and watch it turn into a dove and fly far away, as a wise person in this community suggested as a meditation. And burn that banishing candle, as suggested by @lynn.
@lowtide, it looks like I am not the only one who has appreciated what both @Tesseract and @lynn have suggested doing on this forum recently.
😀
@dannyboy Sending you much Light and Love. In addition to the banishing candle? Write her name on a slip of paper and place in a small freezable container ... fill with water and place it in the freezer. Putting her on ice...with the intent that your interactions with her will be brief and to the Highest Good of all concerned. I am seeing you surrounded with white Holy Light that only those with Love and Light can enter in to your Energy field. 🙏🏻💜🕊️💜🙏🏻
You have my utmost sympathy. You asked for light but your situation makes me anxious on your behalf so I cannot resist presumptuously offering advice based on my own experience; of course, feel free to ignore it.
Can you call on whatever acting ability you have? I think you will need to carefully strategize. I find I do best when I write out what I want to say in advance of a difficult conversation. It helps me both refine my thoughts and avoid pitfalls.
If this boss needs power and control, you might consider giving her the illusion of it. Based on your post, she appears to have willfully misunderstood you which means she does have you in her sites. I suspect she is looking for deference; she wants you to acknowledge her power and position. It may be more than just that but that is probably a chunk. So, if you can, I suggest you give her respectful deference in your communication with her, checking in with her in advance, if situations change, so that she is never surprised. Would a follow up email make sense? Something like, "I always welcome feedback, did I answer all of your questions?" Consider a potential email carefully and perhaps someone else who is politic could read it before you send it, as well as all future emails on which she is copied.
If you want to stay in your position, I would want to assuage her somewhat until you fall off of her radar. It wouldn't surprise me if she were always finding someone to dominate; you need her to move on to someone else. If possible, avoid direct conflict--I bet she likes to fight. Yes, there is a bit of humble pie in this approach, but I think of it as strategic crisis management.
Sermon over----good luck! Proceed with caution.
@lovendures thank you for crediting @Tesseract. I could not recall while typing who had made that wonderful suggestion. It really resonated with me.
I appreciate it - all of you. Those of you who picked up on her need for power - you got it exactly. That and constant praise. Jeanne did a reading for me long ago and said the the boss was the right person for the job but also that she picked up on a woman - a conservative woman in particular who I needed to watch out for. These two are one and the same I now think. My career is hitting new heights with some of my new responsibilities. Unfortunately I think that star rising is threatening her since she’s terrible at her job. Ok also trying to remind myself Jeanne said I had an eject button but wouldn’t need it. I appreciate the good thoughts and the light everyone!
I appreciate it - all of you. Those of you who picked up on her need for power - you got it exactly. That and constant praise. Jeanne did a reading for me long ago and said the new boss was the right person for the job but also that she picked up on a woman - a conservative woman in particular who I needed to watch out for. These two are one and the same I now think. My career is hitting new heights with some of my new responsibilities. Unfortunately I think that star rising is threatening her since she’s terrible at her job. Ok also trying to remind myself Jeanne said I had an eject button but wouldn’t need it. I appreciate the good thoughts and the light everyone!
You are welcome! It is hard to wade through posts sometimes and find the one you are looking for, especially if you doing remember who wrote it.
She just mentioned something about love and fear tonight which also resonates with me. I understand and appreciate the many forms of love ( Greeks have at least 7 different names/forms of different types of love) but I never thought of the many different types of fear, until Tesseract emanated some of them. Not just hate, but anger bigotry, jealousy and so forth. I think I will be have a new lens to look at situations with.
John is angry, what are they actually afraid of right now?
Jen appears jealous, what is it about this situation that makes her fearful?
It may create more understanding/enlightenment. Then perhaps a door will open or a better action plan. I bet it will be especially helpful when dealing with children.