You were all so good to send light to our friend, Thomas, who found out this summer he has cancer. If you have more protection to send, he goes in for a bone marrow biopsy today. It is hitting him that he has only a 50/50 chance of still being here in five years; we are hoping he's one of those amazing stories who beats the odds and goes on to walk his daughters down the aisle and keep restoring Mustangs into old age. Thanks, friends.
Hi all.
I've been away from the forum for a while. I needed to withdraw. There's been a lot of stuff happening all over the world right now and the drama of that and the stuff going on in my own life has been becoming too much.
I am back, I have had time to detach and reflect, but I can't say I am really in a much better place.
I don't like saying too much about my life situation and health usually on the internet. Mainly because I've done this before and been met with judgemental comments and disbelief about my situation both on the internet and real life. But I'm sharing this because I'm struggling in a way I can't describe or put into words that causes me so much deep soul penetrating pain, I dont know what else to do.
Without saying too much, my life was essentially healthy and relatively normal up to 2009. From that year onward my whole life turned upside down to an invisible illness has affected my whole body. I am currently on Total Parenteral Nutrition which I receive via PICC. This is because I suffer from digestive dysmotility, which means the digestive motility of my gut is impaired, so I can't eat food normally and require artificial nutrition, which I have been on for the last 9 years. The cause of this is unknown, but along side this I have neurological symptoms which cause me spasticity, numbness, brain fog, fatigue, and positional headaches. I also have a platelet dysfunction disorder which has no name, which predisposes me to chronic bleeding. I have seen nearly every expert gastroenterologist, neurologist, haematologist, and have had every test you can imagine.
Cont below.
This is now my 12th year on my journey. I now understand more now than I ever thought I would. But I am still struggling and have no diagnosis or treatment.
I am running out of venous access for my lines that I am using for my parenteral nutrition which is keeping me alive. My lines randomly stop working and they can't understand why, despite investigations. I have stenosis in my veins and this complicates future venous access. So the clock is ticking. I'm racing against the clock to get the underlying cause of my illness diagnosed and treated.
I saw a psychic (a clairvoyant) several years ago. He has done readings for my whole family that were amazingly accurate over the years. He gave them insight into my situation when nobody else could. That saved me in many ways. I was in a very dark place at that time. But I also went through a dark time several years ago as well after my brain haemorrhage. I hadn't had a reading from him one on one before, only my family did, so it was my first personal psychic reading. He told me that I would beat this, and that it would eventually be figured out and treated. That I had a normal life ahead of me and a lot of light and healers around me. This was somewhat further confirmed to me by a dream I had in April last year, which I described here: https://www.jeannemayell.com/community/postid/39911/
But despite the positive reading and dream, I am still struggling with this and now we have the pandemic as well. I feel like this is a never-ending nightmare.
I wish there was a real doctor House who could figure this all out for you. Well, a real doctor House but with a much better bedside manner.
I would imagine there is a great deal of emotional trauma you are navigating as you wade through each of the issues your medical complications are causing throughout your body. It must be painful to have others judge or disbelieve what you are going through. My mom had some life threatening illnesses when I was a young child and doctors couldn't figure out what was happening to her either. At a loss for a diagnosis, they eventually told her it was psychosomatic. It wasn't. My grandfather, a biochemist, did a great deal of research and eventually discovered the root cause of her illnesses. He knew his daughter and knew it wasn't psychosomatic. His determination and ability to do investigational research (before the age of the internet) was lifesaving.
She was fortunate. She had an advocate who loved her dearly, was a scientist and would not give up.
The only advice I can offer is to find at least one person in your life who can support you emotionally. Then find a health care professional who will listen first and then think deeply. They must truly listen to process everything you have to tell them and they must be critical thinker, thinking out of the box.
Perhaps a genetic DNA test would provide some key insight. 2 years ago my mom (again) was suffering a strange serious of illnesses which were odd. Her doctor asked her for a copy of a DNA health test she had had previously and discovered some interesting things she would not have considered in diagnosing her condition without the test. She was able to overhaul her medical care plan because of new insight the test gave. It made a huge difference for my mom.
I will keep you in my prayers. I hope you will sense the support and love from our community lifting you higher.
I am so sorry to hear of our struggles. Know that you are believed, and also that you are wished health, and recovery. I am encouraged that the psychic saw us surrounding you. I will pray for you and ask for Divine intervention.
Good news! My daughter's friend Molly, who got covid, now tests negative -- and she had no symptoms somehow. I'm grateful beyond words for the light sent her way. :)