Praying asking God to send AA Raphael to oversee her care and healing and asking that all hands be blessed and guided to be healing,loving hands. Seeing her surrounded and comforted by Holy Light and Angels.
May our thoughts, prayers, love and light be with:
Jeanne's friend Deepti and all the heroic health workers out there
all those who are held in prisons and detention centers
Those working essential jobs: grocery, mail delivery, sanitation, and more
Teachers who miss their students and are doing their best with distance learning
All who are lonely, in grief, and afraid
Continued healing for Vestralux
Blessings for Coyote on his spiritual journey
Emotional support for laynara, Goldstone, Ghandigirl
SisterMoon's husband
James (Lovendures)
Bubble
And
the mother of gbs
all the victims of church abuse
Snowbird's wife, Barbara
the recent storm/tornado victims
Flora and her baby
and @triciact's Aunt Mickey
i hope i haven't missed anyone
BTW, has anyone heard from @vestralux lately? Vestralux, if you are reading this, please punch in, and let us know how you are doing.
Not doing well tonight at all. The pain I feel from my daughter's rejection is hardest at night.
To feel unloved(or maybe just unliked), unwanted by your child is a horrible thing. I wrote to tell her I miss her and asked if she would let me in to be her family again. That I can't die because I need more time with her, and I can't leave this world if we aren't family anymore. She has all the power in her not responding. I feel it's cruel. I feel it's bad for her to not have me in my role as mom. Bad for me, for my recovery.
I try to stay in the present moment, but I am not always successful.
I don't know what to pray for, her heart to turn, or mine to stop aching. So tonight I prayed for G-d to just take this from me. The heartbreak is sometimes overwhelming. Maybe I will pray for Grace and strength to love her anyway. and the courage to admit and deal with the deep & constant disappointment I feel.
Her 21st birthday is in a few days. another milestone I'll be missing. I sent a card, with photos of happy times, and a bunch of jewelry, plus 22 dollars, one to grow on. Sometimes she has written to say thanks for gifts.
When I expect nothing, it is a little less sad, but not much. Her rejection of me is the saddest thing I ever have had to go through. She thinks I left her father for this man. It's not what happened. She is confused and won't allow me to explain. She has made me the villain. She has decided her father is the greatest person in the world and her biggest supporter. Neither of these are true. Truth be told, I was I was her greatest supporter. I tried to keep her safe and happy.
I fear I have lost her. :(
I am so sorry for the pain you are feeling right now. I am sending you strength for the days ahead.
I feel your daughter will come around in time. Something similar happened between me and my mother when I was that age. It took some time, but I came to realize the error of my ways.
When we are 20, we think we know it all. Time will bring clarity. In the meantime, continue to show her that she is loved. She will find her way back to you.
I can second what sistermoon said. When I was younger (17) I asked my mother why she loved my younger brother more than me? She said she didn't love him more, but that she knew my spirit was stronger and that she worried about him more. She said she knew I could take care of myself. I was angry at her all the time. If I could have i would have left home and not seen her much. Then when I was 19 I started to see the error of my ways. When I was 22 my mother died suddenly in her sleep at 2am on Saturday - she was not ill. She had died of a blood clot to her heart. She was psychic and the night prior she tried to hint to me that she was going to die. She tried even to spend more time with me earlier in the week on a Tuesday night, but I didn't show because I chose to spend the evening with my boyfriend.
I spent many years regretting my decision to not to see her that Tuesday night. My point is that I eventually started to see her as one of my best friends someday, gradually at the age of 19 until 22. I felt devastated and cheated out of what I knew would have been wonderful years with my mother when she died. But I was coming around. Now, back then I was maturing in my heart quicker than some others at my age.
I feel eventually your daughter will return. Sometimes the less you expect of them and the more you allow them to come to realizations on their own the better. I don't know when but it will be out of the blue one day. Something will hit her soul. Until then, just tell her you love her but without telling her what you need. My advice is to just let her know how much you love her on occasion but with no caveats.
Blessings to you ghandigirl! ❤️ ? ?
@ghandigirl, I am sorry that your heart feels so heavy and sad. I don't have children, so I can only imagine how much your daughter's rejection must hurt you. And the uncertainty and isolation that we all feel with this pandemic can surely intestify our pain and fear.
As @sistermoon and @triciact stated, I also believe that your daughter will come around in time. I realize that my words may feel like cold comfort for what you are painfully experiencing now. But as sistermoon stated, time will bring clarity to her. You haven't lost your daughter. I feel that strongly. Do not give up hope.
Just continue to love your daughter. If you pray, pray for your daughter. And above all, love and pray for yourself. Be kind to yourself. You are a good, wise, courageous and loving soul, and I am grateful that you are here with us.
Bless you, my friend.
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adding our @elaineg to the prayer list. She says she has been coughing and not feeling good.
I just found out that my Dear Aunt Mickey (my 2nd mom - she helped raise me) does have coronavirus. She's 89 yrs old. please say a prayer. She is weak and sick in bed in the retirement home in Germany.
Guess who just called? My kid! She received the card, photos, and gifts today. We just talked for almost an hour and I was scattered and rambling and she was very accepting. I couldn't stop laughing for several minutes afterwards and I remember taking the pregnancy test and laughing in the very same way.
And now though I am crying. Tears of relief, and tears of regret washing away.
It's a miracle. And unexpected. and you all are psychic-hahahaha cause you were right...and I am laughing AND crying now.